Tony’s Timeless Thursdays: Waiting to Exhale – A Celebration of Sisterhood, Strength, and Self-Discovery

For the 20th day of Women’s History Month, I’m honoring Waiting to Exhale—the 1995 film that became a touchstone for Black women’s experiences, friendships, and the challenges they face in love, career, and family. Adapted from Terry McMillan’s best-selling novel, Waiting to Exhale wasn’t just a movie; it was a cultural moment, bringing to the forefront the complexities, joys, and heartbreaks of Black women’s lives.

Directed by Forest Whitaker and set to a groundbreaking soundtrack by Babyface, this film captured the hearts of millions, portraying the nuanced experiences of women trying to navigate the space between love and independence, heartbreak and healing.

The Story: Four Women, Four Journeys

Waiting to Exhale follows four women—Savannah, Bernadine, Robin, and Gloria—best friends living in Phoenix, Arizona. Each woman represents a different journey through love, heartbreak, motherhood, and career.

Savannah Jackson (Whitney Houston) – “The other woman”

Savannah is a successful television producer with a secret: she’s in love with a married man. Her struggle is every woman’s fear—investing time and emotion into a man who will never choose her.

Savannah’s story represents the difficult choices women make when balancing career success with emotional fulfillment. How long do you wait for someone who may never leave? How much of your worth do you tie to someone else’s decisions?

Bernadine Harris (Angela Bassett) – “The scorned wife”

Bernadine seemingly had it all—wealth, a beautiful home, two children—but her husband leaves her for his white secretary after years of Bernadine putting her own dreams aside.

Who can forget the iconic scene where Bernadine sets her husband’s car and clothes ablaze in the driveway? It wasn’t just cinematic—it became symbolic of every woman who’s sacrificed herself for love, only to be betrayed.

Robin Stokes (Lela Rochon) – “The woman addicted to the wrong men”

Robin is beautiful, successful, but keeps falling for men who are emotionally unavailable. Her story is one of learning to love herself enough to break the cycle of settling for less.

Gloria Matthews (Loretta Devine) – “The caretaker and mother”

Gloria is a single mom who owns a beauty salon, raising her teenage son and still grieving the loss of her ex-husband, who is now remarried. Her world opens up when she allows herself to find love again—not just romantic, but the love of herself.

Why Waiting to Exhale Was Groundbreaking

1. Centering Black Women and Their Stories

Before Waiting to Exhale, there were few Hollywood films that fully centered Black women as complex, multifaceted leads. These weren’t background characters or supporting roles—they were front and center, flawed, funny, angry, loving, and ambitious.

Each woman was allowed to:

Feel rage (Bernadine),
Crave love (Savannah),
Make bad decisions (Robin),
Prioritize her child and herself (Gloria).

It was one of the first films where Black women got to tell their own stories—not about civil rights, not as maids or sidekicks—but as whole human beings.

2. Tackling Real-Life Issues That Women Face

Waiting to Exhale was more than a story about relationships. It tackled the very real challenges women—especially Black women—face every day:

Infidelity and Betrayal

Bernadine’s story struck a chord with millions of women who’ve sacrificed their dreams and careers for their husbands, only to be left behind.

Being the “Other Woman”

Savannah’s struggle with being the mistress explored the emotional conflict of loving someone who is unavailable, raising tough questions about self-worth and settling for crumbs.

Self-Esteem and Repeating Patterns

Robin’s addiction to emotionally unavailable men represented women who confuse sex for love, hoping they can fix what’s broken.

Single Motherhood and Loneliness

Gloria’s journey as a single mom, struggling with an empty nest and trying to open herself up to love, reflected the realities of countless women who spend so long taking care of others that they forget themselves.

The Power of Sisterhood and Friendship

What truly made Waiting to Exhale special was its celebration of female friendship. In a world that often pits women against each other, this film showed the opposite:

💜 Sisterhood was the saving grace.

💜 Laughter, tears, and storytelling became therapy.

💜 These women did not judge each other—they held each other up.

Even when the world failed them, they turned to each other, reminding us that friendship can be the most enduring love story of all.

Iconic Moments That Made History

Bernadine burning the car scene became one of the most referenced moments in Black film history. It wasn’t just about revenge—it was about reclaiming power.
The New Year’s Eve scene, where all four women gather to reflect, laugh, and cry, was the emotional core—showing how women process heartbreak, triumph, and hope together.
Savannah’s declaration that she would no longer wait for a man to choose her was a universal moment of empowerment.

The Soundtrack – A Love Letter to Black Women

Produced by Babyface, the Waiting to Exhale soundtrack became just as iconic as the film. Featuring all Black female artists, it was a musical celebration of womanhood.

🎵 "Exhale (Shoop Shoop)" – Whitney Houston

🎵 "Not Gon' Cry" – Mary J. Blige

🎵 "Sittin' Up in My Room" – Brandy

🎵 "Count On Me" – Whitney Houston and CeCe Winans

Each song echoed the film’s themes: loss, resilience, love, and friendship.

The soundtrack sold over 12 million copies worldwide, proving that Black women’s voices and stories had a global audience.

Tying Waiting to Exhale to Women’s History Month

Waiting to Exhale isn’t just a movie—it’s a testament to the strength of women:

🌿 Women who keep loving, even after betrayal.

🌿 Women who sacrifice, only to learn they deserve more.

🌿 Women who face heartbreak, raise children, and hold families together.

🌿 Women who, through sisterhood, remind each other of their worth.

The film perfectly aligns with Women’s History Month’s mission: to honor the resilience, beauty, and complexity of women’s lives.

It tackled:

Intersectionality: How being Black and a woman adds layers to love and pain.
Economic independence: Bernadine’s journey from scorned wife to thriving businesswoman.
Sexual agency: Robin owning her desires while learning from her mistakes.
Self-love: Savannah learning that choosing yourself is the ultimate power move.

The Legacy of Waiting to Exhale

Nearly 30 years later, Waiting to Exhale still resonates across generations. It opened the door for:

Girlfriends
Being Mary Jane
Insecure
Harlem
First Wives Club (BET)

It was one of the first major Hollywood films to say: Black women’s stories matter, and their friendships are worth celebrating.

Final Thoughts – Why It Still Matters Today

In a world where women are constantly told to wait their turn, put themselves last, or lower their standards, Waiting to Exhale said:

"No. We deserve it all—love, friendship, success, and self-respect."

For Women’s History Month, this film stands as a reminder that Black women have always faced impossible odds, yet they continue to love, rise, and build each other up.

If you love stories that celebrate women’s strength, sisterhood, and the power of choosing yourself, check out my novel series S.O.L.A.D.™: Soldiers of Light Against Darkness™—stories of resilience, self-discovery, and triumph.

📖 Order your autographed copy today at www.tyronetonyreedjr.com/the-shop!